Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
