I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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