So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
