I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
