Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
