soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
