It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
