You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
