My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
