Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
