apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
is that a dick in a sweater?
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
