And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
