she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
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