we're blogging at a bar
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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