There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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