When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
