So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
