Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Randomize
