She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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