it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
