I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
