absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
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