You're completely useless in the revolution.
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I am one with the molecules
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
