i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
