I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
