Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
