you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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