Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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