Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
