every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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