Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
