I like to think it a success when the cops are called
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
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