Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
We got so high we made milksteak
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
