Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
