i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
