Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
should my penis look like a turkey
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Can vaginas get frostbite?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
