And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
