hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
