Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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