kristin has been a bad kristin
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
