Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
It's just like the Real World with babies
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
