Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
