It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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