what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
now i know why i became what i already was.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
