this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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