They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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