I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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