Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize