I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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