I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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